Toxic

 Let's talk about "diet culture".  If you're anything like me, most of your life, whether it was from parental force (how my story begins) or from restrictive behavior you put upon yourself, you have dieted in some form or another.  I remember being taught there were good and bad foods, even before the "clean" eating crew came along.  Good foods were things like turkey bacon, low fat or even fat free cheese, or egg white omelets which honestly is like eating tasteless hot jello with a hint of egg flavor. Bad foods were sugary cereals, regular bacon, BUTTER, Poptarts.  I fell for all of it.  I did Weight Watchers, lost weight, gained weight on it, and was JUDGED at meetings. I ate nothing but a pot of cabbage soup for 5 days straight! All in the pursuit of being thin. Why on earth do we think this is a healthy way of living? 

Diet Culture has trained us to view food and eating this way. And we have turned it into an Olympic event.  Patting ourselves on the back when we restrict calories and stick to 1500 a day, making sure to tell everyone around us.  

I even did KETO for about 3 years.  Eat all the fat you want but carbs are of the devil.  Satan lives in a loaf of bread.  

Guys, I was miserable.  Guilty for not going to the gym often enough, and hungry.

Then I discovered counting macros.  I learned food is food.  Not good or bad, food has no moral standings.  It nourishes you and keeps you alive.  But I was still handcuffed to calorie counting, and this time it also included weighing every gram of food that went in my mouth.  While it came with  more freedom, if I wanted a cookie, or wine, I could make it fit, but it was still restrictive in nature.  Better, but not great.

Enter my AN son.  All the pieces fell into place.  He didn't weigh his food, he wasn't counting calories, he wasn't exercising non-stop.  He simply eats barely anything.  Want everything you have ever thought about dieting, weight loss, and working out until everything hurts to be flipped on its head? Have a loved one with an eating disorder.  

It made me realize that restricting and eating in a "painful deficit" isn't healthy.  Not mentally and not physically.  See, the truth of the matter is, if you want to be a healthy weight, then its calories in and calories out.  Exercise if it makes you happy.  If you want to lift weights because you love it, do it.  If you lift weights because everyone else is doing it and you'll do anything to look like that model over there, stop it.  If you would rather do yoga, but your neighbor runs marathons and is naturally thin so you run too, STOP IT.  Go do some yoga.  If you want a cookie, eat the damn cookie.  Don't eat the entire sleeve of Thin Mints, that my friend is called binging, (and probably also involves eating some feelings).  Don't let celebrities with their "skinny teas", friends touting gross MLM shakes, and instructions to only eat "clean", rule your life.  

Diet Culture is toxic.  Evil.  In the US alone, this year, there are 24 million people suffering from an eating disorder.  This of course, are the ones that are known.  From eating disorders alone, there are about 10,200 deaths.  Read that again.  

Think about it, we allow our brains to be rewired by social media, by commercials, by people we don't even know personally.  Telling us that if we want to look just like them (which is impossible by the way) just eat the way they do, do their workout 2 times a day.  Cause yourself pain, and misery so you can be someone else's perfect ideal.  Isn't this also self-harm? It may not be taking a razor and cutting your skin, but it is harming yourself on purpose to feel better.  

Listen, I want to be thin and pretty.  Just like you.  Why do I have to hurt myself to do it? 

Much love!

Thoughts? Leave a comment :)