Beyond

 I am becoming beyond frustrated with this process.  We came across a facility for my ANS17 that seemed to be the perfect fit.  It was an intensive out patient program, local to our home, and he would be there 5 days a week and be able to sleep at home.  I feel like this is so important to his therapy and well-being as he and I are close and he has been very open with sharing with me where he is at and how he feels.  

He is not in a great place.  He is angry any time his weight goes up, he hates how his face appears round to him.  But his health is spiraling.  Chest pains, trouble breathing, incredible fatigue.  All of these go hand in hand with an ED.  

I was on the phone today with the lovely admissions person, Kate at a facility here in Florida. I reached out because the Alliance For Eating Disorders recommended this particular agency.  Our initial discussion was incredibly positive, and for the first time in several weeks I felt a ray of hope.  As requested I sent in all our insurance information, and then waited for it to be cleared.  A few hours later I received a call, telling me otherwise.  Again, Kate was incredibly helpful, she wants us to find a way to make this work.  For my son to get the help he so desperately needs.  However, our insurance came up as a HMO instead of a PPO and thus requires us to call and get them to switch it to something they will take, or complain until they grant us a single case reprieve.  I'm looking at you TRICARE.  

So now we sit. On the phone, hoping to get someone to listen to us.

In the meantime, I am wondering SO MANY THINGS.  Why was I not born independently wealthy?? WHY is it so difficult to find the help we need? Why on earth would someone withhold care from a child who needs mental health intervention? Why is mental health in our country, maybe just our state, just out of our reach?  I am feeling incredibly desperate at this point.  

It is a huge part of the reason why I am going to pursue my Masters in Mental Health Counseling, I want to create a facility that will reach boys and men in the same position as my son, who need help and can't find help.  And when their insurance won't cover it, or it runs out, that we can provide funding for them, to help them heal and conquer their ED.  This is my dream.  Consider making it yours.